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I'm still with her.

It took me all night to come up with the right words. I can't believe Clinton lost to Trump. I am ashamed to be an American right now.

I threw up three times last night, until I had nothing left but dry heaves. My mom had to talk me out of jumping out the window. I never slept last night. I have friends who are literally going to DIE because of this. I’d leave, but I have no resources. I am afraid for my LGTBQA friends. I’m afraid for my disabled, mentally ill, Muslim, Latino, black, Native friends, i.e., anyone who isn’t white, rich, straight, Christian, and perfect. I am mildly disabled (hearing impaired) and have severe depression and anxiety. I’m afraid for myself.

I’m glad my brother-in-law didn’t live to see this. He died one month ago tomorrow. This would have killed him. I’m scared for my cousin, who has worse mental health problems than I do. I’m scared for my three sweet bi-racial cousins, especially the two boys. I’m scared for my diabetic friend who can barely afford her insulin now.

I’m scared.

I likely won’t be around for 2020 if Trump gets his way with Obamacare. If I can’t afford the meds that keep me from killing myself, it’s bye-bye molly barton.

Comments

orac_zen
Nov. 9th, 2016 11:00 pm (UTC)
There are a lot of people who care about you and don't want anything happening to you.

I'm one of them. :)


I'm another.

I care about both of you and as abysmal a result as this is, you have to try to keep going. Grieve - because I honestly think that's an appropriate thing to do - and then try to be as positive as you can.

*** hugs *** and prayers for you both.